Surreal

 

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Autumn of 2016

Age did get to her in ways, but she carried on, not with the troubles that it caused her, but with a calm sense of strength. A devotee of God, family, music and of life. She always held a saint like serenity.

In those last hours, she remembered all those away; her grandson, her granddaughter, the home keeper who was back in his village – probably bid them a mental farewell. She then called out, “Look”, she said to the other home keeper, “Nag sahib and my mother in law are here. Bring some chai and snacks.” He stepped forth, “There is no one here Mataji”, as he made his way to sit on the sofa. “No, no. That’s where they are sitting”, she said. He stopped, and left her to her conversations with her husband and mother in law. Later that evening, she came out of her room, questioning where everyone was when her consciousness left her. Her daughter in law and son rushed in and made their way to the hospital. She gave everyone 3 days to make peace with the approaching end. It was decided to take her home. She was put in bed, still in her unconscious state, wherein she stayed with the family for a few more hours. On the strike of the next morning, she departed, leaving a legacy behind.

The wondrous thing is that her husband, ‘Nag sahib’ as nicknamed by her, and her mother in law had probably come to ask her to come earlier but she chose to leave after giving everyone time to part with her, not in sorrow, but with strength, on the birthday of her 12 years gone ‘Nag sahib’, a reunion gift perhaps.

In her parting, she made me learn one of the most important life lessons.

We control who we are.
What to become is our expertise.
Follow the path of virtue,
plough the planned uncertainty.

Who to become is our forte.
Pave the way with honesty,
Plant seedlings of pride.
With our soul, leave behind a legacy.

Things we do not understand-
Why sprout the fear?
Instead we look at the unexplainable,
under its wonders surreal.

 

IMG_7027 (1)You are and will be loved and remembered always.

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Nothing

A state of strength and weakness.
Some to avoid, some to stir.
A sense of security.
A state of ignorance.
A peace treaty instead of a call for war.
When someone else stirs, respond with nothing.
There lies the serenity of non-violence.
An armed oppression of the weak, still nothing?
Homes destroyed, bodies laid;
Children’s corpses washed upon the sea shore.
Lives snatched by heinous acts;
Innocence begging for mercy with its barren hands.
Still, nothing?
Mindless games for power at the cost of every moral.
Terror through human made divisions and borders.
Senseless fights with forgotten reasons.
God vs God, Caste vs Caste, You vs You.
Still, nothing?
Mass killings, huntings,
Gruesome deaths of other living beings.
Green deceased, charred lands.
Adornments of corpses.
Still, nothing?

Wielding weapons of words;
Power to stir hearts, unleash the rage.
Force to bleed clarity from the blurred;
Create, reincarnate and change.
Instead, defying the souls’ reliance,
tread on in silence.
Smirking at the gullible mess,
Nothing wins the ongoing chess.
How blind are we-
An ignorant race!
It doesn’t take eyes to see,
our own destructive pace.

We sense and know everything;
Powered by our dormant conscience.
Living a life of the unconscious.
Still, Nothing.

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Embers rising, Bonfire, Delhi 2016

Magic

We dream about travelling the world someday,
Setting the wind upon our sail.
We dream of a fairy tale,
Of true love as they say.

Not everyone can have their way,
Belief bases destiny on fate.
Dreaming with open eyes as I lay,
Each day knocking on the unknown’s gate.

I’m not one for a fairy tale,
But magic does exist.
I see it in a herd sharing a single bale,
It’s in the morning dew and mist.
In laughter and tears shared with friends,
In a mothers touch, in holding a fathers finger,
In falling only to get up, making our amends;
Magic is all around, in a stealthy linger.
The force in a warm hug and kiss,
The way a smile can cure all pain.
Wags and purrs sparking sudden bliss;
Magic is in giving without any gain.

Of all the magical whims blown,
From dawn to dusk, with no end;
How could I have ever known,
Magic is in falling in love with my best friend?

For Forever and For Always

Nature is magical. (Crimson sky in Melbourne, August 2015)

Nature is magical. (Crimson sky in Melbourne, August 2015)

The world, My World

I hold it in my heart
A world with harmony.
Where there is beauty flowing.
The old, young and heavenly,
With winds of wisdom blowing.
With streams, valleys and mountains.
A world with peace.
Women alongside men.
Religions walking hand in hand.
Not opportunities, but the day we seize.
Against the laws of nature,
Cats and dogs playing together.
The rich, the poor –
sunsets and sunrises
Both crimsoning the skies,
Like kites they tangle
But never to dismantle.

But, the world I hold onto,
Never could exist.
For there are barriers;
A clasped fist.
Dreams can turn sour too,
Can we ever tell who is who?
Murder, rape, terror-
With weapons man made,
Bodies and blood laid.
For when one falls,
The other fails.
Such is humanity,
Helpless and disdain.

Oh, I hold it in my heart,
A world with beauty manifold.
Will it be just stories told?
From children rhymes to poems,
We teach and preach about love.
How have we become so forgetful,
To pass each other unnoticed, untold?
Concern for others to mistake for benefit;
Masked in a selfish disguise,
We are all thieves of others,
Living in our demons and ties.

How can I not see rainbows?
Stars swarming the night skies.
Flowerbeds and meadows tingling the nose.
How a hatchling leaps ahead and flies.
Snowflakes blanketing the tree tops,
The happy wags of a tale,
Step by step, little grasshopper’s hops.
I see beauty even in the stormy hail.

I hold it in my heart,
An end without a start.
Not bejewelled or pearled,
But, A world that is My World.

My world  (Port Campbell, Australia, 2015)

       My world
       (Port Campbell, Australia, 2015)

If You yawn, I yawn.

While in the bus that takes us to the airplane, I noticed something that I’ve noticed about a million times before. It’s something that scientists have failed to explain- when anyone who sees another yawning, he/she yawns too. (Is it just me, or it happens over the phone too? If you hear the other person yawn, you HAVE to yawn?)
However, this day was one wherein the inner cogs of my brain started winding.
Humans – we are probably connected to each other in ways that we ourselves have never known. Some like beef over chicken or some love broccoli. Some like black while some like pink. Most of us love holidays; even if some of us might be workaholics, a small trip does excite all of us.
I love dogs, holidays, the sea, hugs, sunsets, reading novels, writing, dancing to each and every song possible, exercising, swimming, horses, a good sense of humour, playing on the xbox, singing while I shower, listening to music when I can’t sleep, and the list can go on. I’m “shit in my pants” scared of spiders, cockroaches and I do not like walking in the dark even if it is my own home. I’m pretty sure while reading this, some of your brains shouted out “me too!”. Basically, I have a lot of things in common with people who I don’t even know. I’m more connected with people who I’ve never known and probably will never really know. You’re connected to people whom you’ve never met and probably will never meet or know. I don’t think this connection can ever be broken; not by religion, caste, colour, gender or any other human made divisions. It’s simple, we created divides just to add some individuality to ourselves so that we don’t get confused with each other. In the end, all of us are quite similar to each other in ways that we will never know.  Then I guess, when we cause hurt and pain to others, we hurt and pain from inside. When so many people get murdered, raped, terrorised, a part of us gets murdered, raped and terrorised.

Here I am thinking, if you yawn, I yawn.

Life's precious moments

Life’s most precious moments

Faith?

– Something I read, Something I borrowed.

This is something that I had read a few years back and it stayed with me so much that I saved it in my phone’s “notes”, edited it a little bit with a few inputs of mine, and I read it every time I feel low. I believe that we all could do some good with it. I have faith.

“As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You’ll have your heart broken and you’ll break others’ hearts. You’ll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you’ll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you’ve never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. You just have to live life to the fullest.
Tell someone what they mean to you before you regret it. Tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone’s hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, and smile until your face hurts. Don’t be afraid to take chances or fall in love, and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend being unhappy, it is a moment of happiness you can never get back.”

Wandering in the sunset of Prague, 2012.

Wandering in the sunset of Prague, 2012.

The happiest, loveliest and most beautiful moments could be
the most unexpected ones.

Such is life, life is Such

A labyrinth of fork roads –
An endless maze;
Twisting turning in a haze.

A frantic compass –
With a destination unknown;
Uncertainty outgrown.

Engulfing commotion –
Silence blaring too loud;
Walking lost in the crowd.

Such is life;
Bottling one in strife.
Skip and jump up ahead;
No time to wonder where the other path led.
Push and push to reach the top;
Cannot afford a single drop.
Such is life;
Led in haste.
Each day’s strife;
A sour taste.

The manifold confusion,
with absolutely no solution.
Over thinking every aspect,
there must be a certain defect.
For I want this and that;
Can rabbits really come out of a hat?
A “maybe” might change it all.
May give enough to face the fall.
A leap of faith, following the unknown;
With failure, seeds of success are sown.

Stumble to find the right way.
One is not stagnant, life cannot stay.
Nothing comes with the wait.
Grab what you want, set up the bait.

There can be ‘if’ and ‘but’.
Destiny keeps up with your strut.
Seek the chance for the final break.
Life is yours to take.
With so many more to touch;
Such is life and life is Such.

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(“Through my eyes”, Goa, 2011)

Heart and Mind

Looking beyond the unknown;
nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.
Seeds of darkness sown;
longing to see the bright side.

Such are times of misery,
when hurt is beyond repair.
Toddling on the slippery,
surrounded by despair.

Reaching the crossroad,
turmoil at the back of the mind.
Burdened and bowed,
Ruins left behind.

Look back once again.
Trace the footsteps another time.
Seek ways to ease the pain.
Let the heart and mind unite.

Love with all your heart.
Think through and decide.
Do not let your sanity part.
Ahead you can then stride.

How much can you lose?
Set your priorities right.
How tight is the noose?
Bring in a little insight.

There is much sense in practicality.
Be strong, bold and wise.
Undo the looming insanity,
Don’t bet love on a dice.

Let the heart and mind guide.
Together, your foresight.
Float through the tide.
Let the heart and mind unite.

(At the top of the Pulpit Rock, 'Preikestolen', Norway, 2013)

(View from the top of the Pulpit Rock, ‘Preikestolen’, Norway, 2013)

Words

Words, tricky things, words.
Moving the others’ worlds.
Must they always penetrate?
Feelings to be kept as bait?

Using them without meaning,
For else, may be demeaning.
How they can stir the heart,
Pierce through, a dart.

For days, a restlessness,
Else’s world quite a mess,
Playing upon those strings,
A sinking ship sings.

A song not heard before,
The meaning those words bore.
How one longs to let them fade,
Cutting one, a double edged blade.

Easy for the spoken to forget,
The sadness still not ready to set.
Such grey, none can know,
Asking the other to let go?

Dreams in tears every night,
A chill; an aching frost bite.
Keeping the mind locked away,
Just to get through the  day.

I truly am trying to forget,
But, a hard course to set.
Every time going back,
This strength, I do lack.

When will I be able to see,
The path to set it all free?
A hope to be able to move on,
Live with a smile to another dawn.
A map to lead all this away,
Time heals all, some say.
A road I would like to find,
To walk ahead, leave it behind.
Faith to wipe my eyes.
Together, I’ve heard, we will rise.

Oh, when will I be able to see,
The path to set it all free.
When I won’t feel lost in vain,
Maybe, I’ll learn to love again.

I wonder how you would do,
Telling me to forget it all too.
The words, that have kept me swirled.
Those words ,that have moved my world.

After all, a thought comes through,
There’s a lot one’s words can do,
In the end, we all must realise,
One cannot be bound to such ties.

Words can cause pain at times,
The power to love; in them it lies.
They may be harsh too,
But, Some are pure and true.

True words can bring back the sanity,
Hold such strength to show some clarity.
How one can undo what’s been said,
A sweet harmony may be spread.

One can take hurtful words away,
And, bring about music to sway.
The melody can then boom,
Blossoming dreams can then bloom!

The choice of words is tricky,
One must truly be picky.
If there has been some unkind,
A sense of calm, again one can find.

Disallow callous words to pierce,
Be bold, be swift and fierce.
Never let words cause pain.
If ever, hold the courage to regain.
The courage to take those words back,
Your Words can bring a rainbow to the black.

Through your sweet words I do see,
The path to set it all free.
A hope to be able to move on,
Live with a smile to another dawn.
A map to lead all this away,
Time heals all, some say.
A road I can then find,
To walk ahead, leave it behind.
Faith to wipe my eyes.
Together, I know that we will rise.

Oh, finally I am able to see,
The path to set it all free.
Beautiful words make it quite plain,
We all have the power to love again.

Image(Sunset at Candolim beach, Goa, India, 2012)

Faint Light

When you see nothing but a faint light,
A suffocating feeling through your bones,
A pain that causes the strangest frost bite,
And a feeling about which no one knows.

Its a blood rush full of pain,
An aching rage in your heart.
No one to talk to, everything’s plain,
And to its end, there is no start.

You try and try, to just fake a smile,
To not succumb to such sadness.
To try and put an end to your own frustration’s pile,
Clutch at some laughter to cure this madness .

In such moments all you see is that faint light,
Not knowing where to go, what to do.
Wonder, Who, in this moment can help to figure out this plight?
Clawing, is a gnome of confusion too.

With everything seeming hollow,
Every moment of colour just fades.
Thinking of yourself and your own sorrow,
Consumed by your own sorry blades.

Halt; just for a while, stop to think,
‘Is this really all you can do?’
Some sense can come with a blink,
After all, the Light is within You.

In you, lies the strength,
The power to overcome all.
Bring yourself to any length,
Pick yourself up after the fall.

With this surge of positivity,
Put behind the unnecessary burden.
You are your own halo and security,
A smile can take over the frown,all of a sudden.

When its all over, you realise,
Its the little things that can turn your world upside down,
How you stand up and rise,
Its on you to walk with the victorious crown.

At the end of the abyss, a ray of hope,
Darkness is even in a beautiful night.
Holding on to your strengths’ rope,
Look back; stronger glows the faint light.

Image(Sunset at Vagator beach, Goa, India, 2013)